America: Just Passin' Through

I Have a Dream

2009-05-28T09:23:00.000-07:00

Republicans boldly appoint avowed conservatives to the Supremes. Namely, these guys: Scalia, Thomas, Roberts, Alito. They belong to the right-wing Federalist Society. They hire right wingers as clerks and help them move up the ladder in the court system or corporate world. They have an ideology and a strategy to match.

Democratic Presidents timidly nominate moderates to the Supremes, who deny being even mildly liberal. They do not belong to the ACLU, and claim not to know anyone in the Lawyers Guild. They have no ideology, they are just broad minded.

Barry Goldwater summed that up: "Sometimes a broad mind means a flat head."

So, while it’s great to see a Latina join that stodgy club, she’s a former corporate lawyer and prosecutor with no populist inclinations. She will join the so-called "liberals," a la Souter.

“Liberal” is reduced to this: they will not allow prayer in the schools and will uphold Roe v Wade and affirmative action. I’m glad they do, but, in fact, so is corporate America glad. After all, CEO's have daughters who may need an abortion, and they rarely put monuments of the Ten Commandments in their corporate HQ.

Thus a liberal is not someone who stands up to corporate power, but one who dares to part ways with Rush Limbaugh.

A corporation is considered a "person" in this country. Corporations have "free speech rights," for example. Find that one in the US Constitution! Name one "liberal" potential nominee from Obama who will laugh at that nonsense as you and I do. Or cry, when the context is more real.

Well, I was thinking about this, and then I had a dream last night. What follows is a verbatim transcript of my dream...

I turned on NPR in the morning and heard:

"Today I am nominating a person who will bring a small bit of balance to the court. Not a corporate lawyer, but a people's lawyer. Not one who joins country clubs, but one who has picketed them. Not one from a corporate firm, but one from a public interest firm. Not one who believes that a polluting corporation enjoys "Constitutional rights," but one who believes that corporations need to be reined in.

"Today I nominate a man who knows that when the US Constitution was written, the drafters were concerned about checking the global reach of the King of England. And he knows that today the Queen of England has more tea bags than power, and he is concerned about checking the global reach of corporations.

"And so now, we will have one justice out of nine who stands on the side of the hard working people of this nation.

"Today I nominate Paul Alan Levy.

"And, on a lighter note, I've learned that Paul's friend Stosh Pulaski drove him to the Men's Wearhouse yesterday to get him a spiffy new outfit for this historic occasion."

And then I woke up to America.

California Gay Marriage...Is it Time for a New Idea?

2008-05-19T05:34:00.000-07:00

The California Supreme Court says same-sex marriage is a human right. Woo-hoo, our rights actually might increase a notch.

That’s cause for celebration in this Patriot Act Decade, when our rights have been disappearing faster than polar bears. A friend from Scotland was recently denied re-entry to the USA, where he is legally quite gainfully employed, because several years ago he went scuba diving in the Red Sea. Did Homeland Security think that name meant it was a commie lake? No, they accurately detected that it’s located in the Middle East. You cannot swim underwater with Arabs on nearby shores and expect to work in the land of the free.

So I figured now at least two guys can tie the knot in Fresno. Then a California friend called, and he seemed less happy.

My astute friend – he lives in San Francisco, where everyone is either astute or gay and usually both – pointed out that six of the seven judges who made the ruling are Republicans.

Now the issue is not only headed for the California ballot, but for the national political spotlight in November.

So that got me thinking about the sacrament of marriage. I offer a new idea (if those are allowed) for the left: campaign for an end to state-sponsored marriage.

This has the advantage of being good policy and also throws the right wing gay-bashers off their game. And maybe we’ll win a few people over: that’s one element that the left often avoids, but what the hell, let’s go for it.

So, here’s the plan.

Marriage would henceforth be sanctified only by priests, imams, monks and sundry other consecrated ones. No more sacraments at city hall.

The state shall henceforth grant a civil union to any couple over the age of consent. This will cover such un-spiritual matters as pensions, health care, inheritance and form 1040.

We can point out that we’re saving holy marriage by getting activist judges and secular legislators out of the loop. In fact, if any judge so much as mentions marriage, we’ll have that sucker impeached, recalled or whatever pulls their judicial plug.

We can seek endorsements from bible thumpers of all stripes – from Frisco to Waco -- for the Holy Sanctified Marriage Act. Even the polygamists can get on board: marry as many consenting adults as your personal potentate prescribes.

The term win-win just leaps to mind.

Could America Go Smart?

2008-04-27T14:37:00.000-07:00

Obama can’t bowl. We laugh. Hillary takes a shot and a beer. We laugh harder. It’s America, where Ivy League multi-millionaires play at being regular folks, but usually about as well as George Bush plays President.

Obama can win the city and split the burbs, but Clinton’s got the white working class. It’s macro-analyzed, micro-analyzed and re-analyzed.

But maybe they’re missing the real question: could America go smart?

Could smart become chic, and then waltz right in and displace dumb as the American political paradigm?

One defining characteristic of American politics is the love affair with dumb. It goes way back and way deep. What other country could boast a thriving party called the Know Nothings. That was like two centuries ago (but only one century old when I learned it in civics class). It was anti-immigrant -- some things never change.

It’s not just the right either, though surely a political culture of dumbness plays to the right. Remember, the original crusader for anti-evolutionism – another uniquely American dumbassity – was our greatest populist, William Jennings Bryan. Maybe it’s understandable: poor folks have been called dumb so long they just don’t trust smart.

Ronald Reagan, the most influential President of my long lifetime, could not distinguish the history of WW II from war movies. When he debated Carter, and Carter made a fool of him, he intoned "There you go again," a line that scored a knockout with Americans. Carter was buried in a landslide of dumb.

George Bush portrayed himself as a regular guy, and, incredibly, it worked. Out of 300 million people, I can’t think of one who better personifies being a child of privilege. Yet he successfully portrayed his opponents as elitists (well that wasn’t hard with Kerry, was it?). His country estate became a "ranch." He’s dumb and thus a bona fide regular American.

Bill Clinton, he’s smart. Yale and Oxford. But he played Joe Six-pack in the movie of American politics. Hillary – Radcliffe and Yale – tells us tales of grandpa teaching her to hunt. Hunt what? Cattle futures? She’s playing us for dumb, a tried and true strategy.

In other countries, politicians pretend to be smarter than they are. Must be really weird to be there! Imagine a debate in, say, France, where the French Reagan tries "there you go again" and the other Frenchie says, "Do you really think the French people will buy that crap?"

Once I was at a debate with the Prime Minister of Belize. His opponent was wearing flip-flops. The chairman of Blue Creek village told the Prime Minister his priorities were wrong. They both sounded smart. The nearest high school was a long bus ride away.

When Oscar Arias, or Mandela, or Palme, or Arafat won the Nobel Prize, that enhanced their reputation among their people. But Gore… if he had a chance at a comeback, that Nobel finished him off. There ain’t no bowling alleys in Norway. (Or is it Sweden, those two are too confusing to us Americans.)

Tipping Point?

Then comes along Obama. All this talk about Obamamania, Obamicans, etc, but what strikes me is that he isn’t talking dumb. Why hasn’t that finished him off?

They say he’s so eloquent. But maybe that means he playing smart. And maybe there’s a market for that now. A bigger market than the back seat of an 8-air bag Volvo.

I don’t ever listen to these politicians. I paid my dues to do-goodness and I just don’t have to suffer through that. But after the Obama race speech, a friend told me I had to check it out. So I read it on line. Very different. Not profound, not pungent, nowhere near a King speech. But it was smart. That was the stunner. So I went on line for other Obama speeches, and, sure enough, they were smart, too.

Then I started thinking about working people I know, and how many of them want smart leaders. Maybe there is some tipping point we’re near, where leaders will have to play smart. They’ll have to say they know more about the theory of evolution than the other candidate. ("Why, I just re-read the original Darwin last week!"). They’ll brag that they read Harvard studies proving that cutting taxes on the rich leads to the rich getting richer but nothing much useful to you and me.

They’ll claim that when they go bowling, between frames they study how to stop the spread of nuclear weapons.

I don’t know if it would change much. But at least I’d be less embarrassed about the whole thing.

Big Wally Comes to Town

2008-03-27T16:44:00.000-07:00

Our very first Wal-Mart opened in Detroit. Well, not actually in Detroit, nothing opens there. But in the closest suburb, a straight shot down the street from our homestead.

So there I went. For research purposes only, mind you.

It’s big. I knew that, but now I’ve got the feel. Like I knew a steam locomotive was big, but then I saw one indoors at the transportation museum in Detroit, and it was …big. That was my first Wal-Mart impression, and, well, my biggest one.

In fact, I now suspect this is the key to Wal-Mart’s success. Be Bigger Than Everyone Else. Americans are all about big. Big cars. Big money. Big televisions. Big weapons.

It’s got a Subway (no, not public transportation, this is America). It’s got an optometrist (well, so does Sears, Wally.). It may have body piercing and motorcycle mufflers, too. I didn’t begin to explore the outer reaches.

I headed straight for my favorite stuff: food. I compared (apples-to-apples comparisons; in one case, literally) prices to my market, E&L. E&L was cheaper on all 10 comparisons. Bigger is not always cheaper.

I headed out of the fresh food, which must be Wally’s weak spot. There were case-lots of paper towels. I do have a basement, so this could be attractive. I had no basis to compare prices on those. Probably cheap, don’t you think?

A Wal-Mart associate was stocking jars of pickles. Staring at the pickle rack, I asked "I don’t see pickled okra, do you have it?" She offered a blank stare, then "I don’t know" and resumed stocking. Score one for Kroger.

I bought a jar of crunchy peanut butter for $2.39. The kind whose ingredients are peanuts, salt. Kroger has the same Smuckers but no crunchy. My Maggie is choosy. Wally scores a point.
Notice that my research turned participatory. I think it gave me a truer Wal-Mart Experience: immersion science.

I headed outta food, and into the vast expanses of baby strollers, tote bags, and giant beer coolers. I was fascinated with the size of some of those. They could be used in a mystery movie where the body is hidden in a beer cooler. With extra room for 2 cases of Bud Lite. Once again, I had no basis for price comparison. I suspect it’s all cheap. (Am I getting sucked into America’s vortex?)

I am seeking – this is all in the interest of science – an outdoor thermometer. I start testing the friendly associates on where I might find one. Two associates come back with blank stares. A third listlessly says "garden section" in a tone that suggests a wild guess. It does sound like a good one.

The garden associate, when asked, states (I am not making this up; the integrity of science is on the line.) "Did you check each aisle in this department?" I said "Is that what I should do?" The now-familiar blank stare locked on. (Do they program them to look like that trademark smiley face, only dumber?)

I’m getting shop-phobia. Which I suffer from, especially inside malls. I stay out of malls for this reason. My credit card balance is zero, also for this reason. So I head for the check-outs.

I’ve been watching the Wal-Mart ads on TV in preparation for this research. The ads show their vast expanse of check-out lines for your convenience.

Indeed there are many. But ¼ of them are open. The line takes 9 minutes. Wally is copy-catting Kroger: lotsa checkouts, few operating.

I’m safely out. But now I face the final act in the tale of Bigness. The parking lot appears to stretch from Dearborn to Arkansas. And I have forgotten where I parked. Maybe I’m not smart enough to shop there. I’m comfortable with that.

Goodbye, Wally.

Stosh Finds Common Ground with Bush

2007-08-14T17:54:00.000-07:00

George Bush says people should shop for medical care as they do for deodorant or kosher pickles. One more bad idea from his feeble mind.

But under our present system, maybe he has half a point: the prices are hidden from the consumer. Remind me, why is that?

I thought about this yesterday, two months after my one-day trip to the hospital. In two months I had received only one bill; it was from the hospital, which seemed to assigned a portion of the bill to me in the most arbitrary way. And not a word from Blue Cross. This surprised this healthcare virgin; I thought my mail box would runneth over with paper.

So I called Blue Cross. The person on the line was not Nice. Maybe Nice was on vacation, and Crisp was filling in. Ms. Crisp seemed shocked that I would seek such private information as how BC determined my share of the cost. She actually stated "it's up to you" to figure that out. When I asked for help, Crisp admitted she could not figure it out either, and indeed it looked wrong to her. Incredibly, she managed to stay Crisp during this brief Admission Phase of our chat.

So she said she would ask a higher power to write to me "within 30-60 days" (The hospital is gonna be in a bad mood by then...up to 4 months from service, no payment from me. I kinda like that part.)

I'm wandering. Here's the point, if there is one...

I pressed on. "Where is the bill from the surgeon?" Crispy moved closer to Grouchy now. It was as if I had asked "What's your cup size?" How inappropriate. Finally, under gentle pressure, she rattled off some numbers. She ran through four names who got respectively $1900, $2800, and two got exactly $5000. (This was on top of the hospital's $21,000 and who knows what else.) Whoa there, Crispy. That last guy is the surgeon but the other three... just who are they? She then morphed directly to Ms.Snotty and s-l-o-w-l-y explained that in a hospital there are behind-the-scenes folks looking out for me, and I could never understand just what they might actually do.

I suggested it might be in BC's interest for customers to actually know who gets paid for what, and perhaps even question it, since BC is paying the majority of the money to these cats. She snapped back into Crisp persona and our time together came to an abrupt close.

Which left me wondering... maybe Bush has a point. As a NY Times piece cogently argued a week ago, a big factor in the medical cost difference between the USA and Europe is what the doctors rake in here. Post the chart. Let the sun shine in.

Ps. I investigated a little and found that the other $5000 went to the surgeon's partner. $5000 for each of them, for four hours. I think Gershwin said it: Nice work if you can get it.

Stosh Battles Media Bias

2007-07-30T19:19:00.000-07:00

The Detroit Free Press Sunday front page screams the news that Michigan has a higher percentage of millionaires than America. Woo-hoo, we are in the pink after all.

I snatch the paper from Maggie. I gotta see this. Surely there will be charts and graphs that I crave with my coffee.

Nope. No charts, no graphs, not even a fun-fact except that 3% of USA households have assets over $1 million but 4% of Michigan households do. Much ink over nuthin.'

But I read on. And on. Through the huge inside continued. It turns out, the article is actually about Anyone Can be a Millionaire, Through Hard Work. This is not on Border's out-sized Self Help Shelf, but the front page lead of Michigan's big paper. One guy in Bloomfield Hills made it by the time he was 26, working "90 hours a week." The careful reader notes that his name sounds familiar; turns out that his pop owns a huge car dealership out in the burbs somewhere.

Hmm. A millionaire begets a millionaire. Maybe that could be news. So I move my coffee to the computer and pen a helpful suggestion.

Sent: Sunday, July 29, 2007 10:13 AMTo: Tompor, SusanSubject: Millionaires

Ms. Tompor,

I read your millionaire piece with interest. Interesting that 3% of USA households have $1 mil or better in assets, but 4% in Michigan.

I have a critique to offer, which leads to a suggestion for another piece.

In a long article, you have only one clause with a clue on the #1 reason for the growth in the number of millionaires ("wealthy families passing along their money to children and grandchildren...")

I would suggest that most of those millionaires got there by that method, and fewer by the means you indicate in the article: hard work.

They inherit money from parents and grandparents; working folks often instead financially take care of parents or grandparents. Big difference.

Long before inheritance time, they also have trusts and gifts to put their kids thru college; free down payments on a house as a nice wedding gift to avoid any debt; same for cars, private schools for the kids, smooth sailing thru college and law school, money passed along if they get into some difficultly or have an illness, you name it. Working folks dont often have those benefits.

And this doesnt even get to the connections that wealth brings, connections that bring more wealth.

As you indicate, 500 GM management people have $1 mil or better in just their 401(k), while 5 hourly workers do. Interesting ratio. How many of those management folks got up that high simply by "hard work" and how many came from well-to-do families?

Punchline: I think it would be interesting to do a piece on this factor of wealth-thru-inheritance. With stats on what percentage of millionaires got the bulk of their wealth by such transfers. Interesting, and informative, on such issues as the inheritance tax debate. If most rich people worked hard 90 hrs a week collecting pop bottles to get there, then the inheritance tax may seem unfair. If most are just lucky-by-birth, even if wonderful folks -- though there are plenty like Paris Hilton -- then the inheritance tax looks a lot different.

I hope this is of interest.

Stosh Pulaski
Detroit

And I got this response:

Thanks for your note. I appreciate your comments.
Susan

My Very Own Sicko

2007-07-05T16:24:00.000-07:00

If I made a movie about American healthcare, I would not make France the positive example. Too alienating to the American mainstream. Not only did they go to France, but then the director squished his fat self into a teeny-weeny frogmobile to head out on a "house call" (Americans do not want doctors coming to their house; they barely let their neighbors come there.)

And I would think twice before having one of my stars mention that some American doctors want five fancy cars. Too alienating to the middle class left; that's my core audience.

Speaking of stars, would I make the film's political guru a Labor Party has-been, who speaks in that stiff British accent we love to mock? Don't think so.

And for chrissake the last frigging thing I would ever do is put Cuba in the damn thing. What was he thinking?!

That's what I would do. A clean case, straightforward, on the mark. No distractions.

No one would come to see it. Weekend gross would be exactly zero. My friends would glumly accept a free DVD and tell me it was good, the way you tell your mom her meatloaf is good.

This is why I do leaflets and Mike Moore does films. They are tightly scripted for sure, but they veer off course. I suspect that the mass demo scenes in France (no way would those get in my movie) were actually conceived by the unscripted remarks of one of the interviewees.

I think the Canada-England-France-Cuba odyssey made the film. The first half of personal stories of American medical evils, that part was good. But some seemed over the top. Like a woman's policy was cancelled after the fact, sticking her with five-figure bills, because she previously failed to disclose she had a yeast infection. (I have a five-figure medical bill lying around here somewhere, and I am not fearing that Blue Cross will say I failed to disclose my childhood measles. Then again, perhaps I should be.) The personal stuff was good, but the case for every-other-country-does-it-better, in its Moore-ish trek and screwball manner, made the movie. Yes, including the wacky, inappropriate Cuba ending.

It made the case for socialized medicine in a real way, without charts and graphs.

So the Nation review (interesting, and positive to be sure) says the Cuba part spoiled the movie, by turning off all the anti-commies. I'm giving that a thumbs down. It makes me realize that the only thing more boring than my movie would be one made by the editorial board of the Nation. Even the foundation that gave them the grant wouldn't watch that puppy.

$4.6 million the first weekend. I dont know if that is on track with Fahrenheit or not. Hope so. It's his most important film yet.

Drink Coke in Vegas

2007-05-31T18:10:00.000-07:00

Everyone in the whole world knows about Coca Cola. Hunter gathers in the Amazon basin have fridge-packs. They might even know the Secret Formula.
Here in America, half the people know about the theory of evolution, the other half thinks Iraq caused the 9/11 attacks, but 100% know the fabulosity of Coke.
Why would this corporation pay good money to advertise?
Because everyone wants to be with the crowd. If it’s approved by Tiger Woods or Tom Cruise, we gotta drink it.
Everyone but me. When a product is advertised, my supermarket buggy won’t make that stop.
I don’t have to work at this, like I do if I go on the exercise machine. It just feels good to hop off the American Crowdmobile as often as possible. That’s my happy place.
So I see in the paper everyone is leaving Michigan. This makes it seem swell to me.
This came to mind the other night in the sports bar, as I’m watching the Pistons with Maggie (they don’t put NBA playoffs on network TV anymore, so we can’t see the games at home). The guy next to us is cellphone-loud, yelling to his buddy, the TV, the world. I avoid eye contact.
He announces that he wants to move to Vegas. He says everyone’s movin’ there. He’s right about that: it’s America’s fastest growing city.
Las Vegas means "the meadows"… musta been named by the same comedian who named "Greenland."
I’m thinking, as the Pistons are busy losing to the Cavs, that Michigan is looking good. Loud morons who crave outsized casinos in the desert are leaving. Are we thinning the herd of the droopy IQ’s?
But I keep hearing that all the educated young people are leaving. That’s bad. Maybe the bar dope won’t make it to Vegas. He’ll get stuck in Lincoln Park, left eating the dust of the brainiacs busting out of the big mitten.
But is it really true? Where are all those Michigan-bred literati headed? Vegas? I think not. LA? Same desert, with longer commutes. It can’t be Buffalo, that’s a downsized Detroit with extra snow. Could it be Florida, with all that plastic? How smart are people that elect that other Bush? They build mansions on barrier islands then act surprised when hurricanes knock em down. The Big Apple would appeal to me. But it’s already overcrowded, and if the rust-belters are heading there, bumping into all those Caribbean islanders coming on board, it’s gonna be sardine-land. Besides, it has a whiny quality that can drive one to hard drink. I love the Northwest, maybe the smarties are Portland-bound. I do know some geniuses there who seem happy. If I go there, maybe I can pass for one.
Then again, Michigan may be just the ticket. In a world headed for ruination of every square meter, less population pressure doesn’t sound too bad. No to Coke. Yes to Faygo.

Blowing off Gas

2007-03-21T12:44:00.000-07:00

Today’s front page headline blares "What’s Fueling Gas Prices?" in 3" type. I didn’t read it, as I’m confident I know the answer better than the Detroit News reporter assigned to crank this crap out. But I’m all over the chart. In truth, the charts are my favorite part of any news article. I love ‘em. Including the bad ones.

After careful study of this humongous full-color graph, I have learned that I can, on average, save 1.3c per gallon if I skip buying on Saturday and head for the local Caldeans on Wednesday. My new motto: "hump day is pump day." I can save 13c on a 10 gallon trip.

Americans are dumb – that’s the premise here, you knew that in advance. But the fetish with gas prices provides fresh proof, in case your faith in American dumbassity has weakened.

Dumb? Dear one, this is beyond that, it’s dumbest. Americans love to buy a new car for $20,000, drive it 135,000 miles and sell it for essentially nothing. Do that math, that’s 15c a mile. They buy car insurance, a scam that makes a Nigerian spammer blush, for up to $3000 a year. At 20,000 miles, that’s another 15c a mile. Many people finance those chubbies, to the tune of another 10c a mile.

Hmm. We’re up to 40c a mile to roll their butts down Michigan Avenue. Don’t let me start on the electronic gadgets they pay extra for, which break more often than Bush lies. If you aren’t strong enough to crank open a window, please stay on the porch.

Then they whine that gas went up 50c a gallon. At 20 mpg, which is being generous for a typical chubby, that’s a 2.5c per mile hike. 2.5c? Didn’t you notice you paid that for the fucking cup warmer? Or the refrigerated glove box? Hell, look what you paid for insurance, which has a street value hovering 2 millimeters above zero. Gasoline at least gets you to the mall, where there are more gadgets to get.

In Europe gas costs $6 per gallon. Man, if they were gringos we could hear the whine all the way across the Atlantic. In California, maybe even the long way, over the Pacific.

The difference is all tax. The price of crude oil is global, the price of refining is global, and the corporations and their profits sure as hell are global. The price of crude oil constitutes the bulk of gasoline price in the good ol’ USA. Refining and transport do add in, but are quite efficient. Refineries are down to like four workers, and one of them is gonna take a buy-out.

Gas is taxed 50c in the USA and $4 in Europe. Could this be a clue to why all the attention is focused on gas prices, in the country with the cheapest gas in the whole world? (Ok, there are a couple political oddball lands that subsidize it, but they don’t count, do they?).

In fairness – and we must above all be fair here -- American economists have long noted this nuttiness. That people will waste enormous sums buying new cars laden with gadgets, finance them, insure them from corporate grifters, even own multiples, and then whine about the smallest cost -- the part that actually makes the thing go. But their reasoning is shallow. It often goes like this: the price is advertised on big signs on every block, so people tend to dwell on it way too much.

I warned you that it would be shallow. Here, we go deep.

All that whining serves a purpose. It has a populist gloss "Sunoco’s loco! Hex on Exxon!" but the content is all-corporate. We want gas, lots of it, and we don’t want no stinkin’ taxes. We will conquer any people, bomb any homeland, and rape any wilderness for our joy juice. Tax it? No way.

If big oil isn’t paying off the Detroit News and the rest of the media, it just goes to show that American capitalism is working beautifully, without resorting to blatant corruption. Keep ‘em whining, keep it flowing.

Let’s meet next Wednesday down by the pump, we can whine together.

Doing My Taxes

2007-03-08T12:12:00.000-08:00

You hate doing your taxes, right? I do too, but I also like it. I find myself playing with various tax tables. I prefer the paper ones that smell of newsprint. But I settle for the on-line ones and print the ones that I really want to get close to.

Today’s output from this time-waster: America has achieved a flat, totally regressive income tax. I knew it, but now I know it for real. It took some effort, because there is no table for the capital gains tax, the one rich people pay. You have to find the right form to figure out the rates and brackets.

Wealthy people, most of whom get the bulk of their income from dividends and appreciation of stocks, bonds and other investments, (rather than salary) pay only 15% income tax. This "capital gains" tax rate was first slashed to 20%, then more recently down to 15%. (It’s even lower – 5% -- at modest income levels.)

So the wealthy pay the exact same 15% tax rate that I pay. Along with other modest-income folks. We have a flat tax, except for the poor. And consider this: The right wants to lower the capital gains down to zero; I haven’t heard the Democrats counter by proposing to raise it. Could I soon be in a higher tax bracket than the Fords and DuPonts?

I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. So I move on to my State Forms.

I find a cool chart with all 50 states compared.

Michigan is one of six states which has a flat income tax (3.9% flat rate). Four of these Worst Six are so-called blue states: Massachusetts, Pennsylvania, and Illinois, along with Michigan. Blue means what now, exactly? We have to register our guns? Could we trade that gun thing for a progressive tax?

Nearby Ohio has a steep progression, from .7% to 7% (the latter starts at $200K adjusted gross income). California has brackets from 1% up to 9%. Do ya think all the movie stars will re-locate to Livonia? Some states (including Tennessee) tax only dividends and capital gains, not wages. The most conservative state in the USA, Utah (70% for Bush), has tax brackets from 2.3% to 7%. We need more Mormons around here. Maybe not, I don’t want to have to go to Toledo for beer. And I need one right now.

I gotta get out of these damn tables.

White Europeans: the Next Dodos

2007-03-04T12:25:00.000-08:00

It’s in the New York Times, that makes it official: there are too few white people. This is leading to "dire predictions about a vanishing people." Wow, and I’m one the vanishers.
I wouldn’t make it up. Well, I might, but you can check it out for yourself at "The Motherhood Experiment" in today’s NYT Magazine.

In America there are two sides to every issue. Never three, or, heaven forbid, six, but we do get two. You know that because you’ve seen "Nightline." There’s that short guy who was Clinton’s PR man, and some right winger who says global warming is a hoax. Two sides.

But not on this one. "Scholars blame several phenomena" but apparently all these scholars agree on the gravity of the situation. "America has escaped such problem…staving off a crisis"…only due to immigration of breeding Mexicans.

Criminy, it’s beyond a problem, it’s a crisis.

It’s not just today’s article, I’ve read a dozen. They all assume, without so much as a qualifying footnote, that there is a crisis of low birthrate in Europe, and it will sweep through North America as soon as that wall is high enough or fortified with enough voltage.

No pundit ever seems to say "low birthrates are good." No one even says they are neutral, or not-so-bad. Low birth rates for white people are like Hugo Chavez: all bad, all the time.

No one in these articles says --

the population is projected to reach 10 billion at mid-century, way beyond sustainability, or…

in a few decades people are not likely to enjoy the wealth that white people do today, or…

fewer people means more sustainability, and fewer wars over scarce resources, or…

if there’s a crisis of extinction in North America or Europe, why not remove the walls and install freeways, or…

when you go to the concert or the ball game, don’t you love it when there are empty spots in the expensive seats, so you can sneak down, or…

it already takes 90 minutes to drive your SUV to work in California traffic, or…

… Ok enough already.

You’ve heard on talk radio (or more likely read about talk radio in Nation) that low-lifes say we need to breed more white people to counter the lower races. Responsible citizens repudiate those foul-mouthed, Fox-addicted racists. The NYT editors don’t even own AM radios.

Seems to me that the NYT writer has the same line, but in polite lingo. Oh, they do note that Singapore has gone too far as it "encourages its better-educated citizens to start families, while at the same time discouraging poor and less educated." Note how delicately that is worded: they’re just a tad overzealous.

The Times piece notes that Italy is especially un-prone to breeding. They remind us, in case we forgot, that it’s Catholic, a status sure to put you in deficit with the elite crowd.

The solution? The Northern Europeans are starting to offer cash incentives to breeders, to avoid becoming a "vanishing people." Turns out that social democrats know how to go forth and multiply. With cash in hand. I always knew they were super-smart, but it’s nice to be reminded.

Warning: The Health Food Store is Dangerous...

2007-02-10T12:21:00.000-08:00

Warning: The Health Food Store is Dangerous to More than Your Personal Health

Well, not if you just duck in for a shot of pricey soy juice. And, assuming you avoid all the offers of potions will cure everything from diabetes to lumbago.

It’s the new-age anti-science that is dangerous.

Everyone I know is reading Richard Dawkins’ new book. I bought it for Maggie. It came in a chrome wrapper, like a 1957 Buick. Those Buicks had power. I hope it’s good, but does he talk about the health food store? I doubt it.

The future of humankind is on the line in this century. The destruction of the planet is probably going to get up close and personal in this century, possibly even in my short remaining time. As this happens, I fear that we’ll see more wars, genocidal brutality and famines as resources deplete and unequal distribution means many will face hard times or worse.

Salvation, as best I can tell, lies in movements from below that mobilize and inform and empower those with a collective and broad-based interest in addressing not only inequality, but protection of the planet.

But it also depends on a scientific approach. The technology-gone-wild society cannot be tamed by movements or revolutions alone. We need a widely-held appreciation of the problems and the solutions.

In the USA 50% of the population rejects the theory of evolution. Global warming? Who says so, some guy with bad hair from Harvard, or maybe even one with from India.

Another dangerous trend exists, also uniquely American, and it is entering the mainstream. On the plane home recently, the woman next to me read a book called "Qi". I peeked (don’t I always?). It was scary stuff. It says we are permeated by an invisible life force which can guide our society. A full-course individualist political philosophy, served with a side order of green tea.

Want to cure malaria? Send dogwood leaves. Don’t send vaccines: this crowd is actually joining the far right in opting their kids out of vaccinations. Vaccines, social medicine’s greatest victory, are on the hit list. Just like the Birch Society’s 1950s anti-floridation campaign.

Presently it’s a small threat, but it’s growing, and it’s got more 21st century oomph than the old backwoods anti-science. The villain in the Scopes trial was William Jennings Bryan. Bryan is not all over the world wide web like Qi dust.

The new anti-science may blend with the old in a noxious suburban stew. The NY Times magazine recently had an article on this cross-over of new age with the right wing.

Fundamentalism with Evian water instead of holy water. San Francisco and Dallas can meet in Phoenix, which is precisely where the Times piece found the convergence.

It needs to be confronted, with or without a chrome jacket.

It's America -- I Need Another Credit Card

2007-01-29T12:30:00.000-08:00

A while ago some company misplaced their financial records, so I got a notice offering a free sub to TrueCredit. This outfit monitors your accounts to check for identity theft, or, more likely, your college-age kid looting your mastercard to play on-line poker.

It did say free, so I signed up.

Today I got a monthly report and instead of deleting it as usual, I read it. I learned of a wonderful opportunity to find out my "credit score," and since it again said free, I snapped it up.

My score is "748," which is pretty decent for the Verbal SAT so I figured I could go back to college. Then I saw the scale and it turns out I am "good" but well shy of "very good." I am in precisely the 78th percentile, which probably gets me into the Wayne State of Credit. Or maybe just WCCC.

I wondered why I didn't ace this test. I thought of yesteryear's indiscretions, when I operated on a cash-only basis, used other names, and skipped out on many bills. But those good ol’ days were a "free period." No computer, no foul.

Wow, 748. Not 7 of 10, not even 74 of 100, but a really precise, highly scientific "score." So how can I become a better person?

The answer was just a scroll away. It was addressed "Dear Stosh" so I feel sure it was personally crafted for me.

TrueCredit had two important pieces of advice for me.

"Consider opening a new account to strengthen your credit report and improve your score." To get a good score, I need to get more credit cards! From looking at the wallets (yes, I peek) of fellow customers at the grocery store, they must ace this puppy.

"It is a good idea to use your credit cards regularly but remember to keep your balances at or below 35 percent of your available credit limits." OK. Not only do I need more cards, but also I must "use them regularly." Run them up to 35% of the limit ($15K on my present card, so that would be $5,250 debt to carry at 17% interest.) I need multiple cards used regularly to become a "very good" citizen, credit-wise.

So the banking industry gives you a high "score" if you open more credit cards at their banks and use them regularly to pay the banks enormous interest rates. And their "score" pretends to be science, and determines how much mortgage interest you pay.

After careful consideration, I decided to retain my relatively modest credit status, and just work on boosting my self-esteem in other ways. I'll bet someone sells scores for that, too.

Passin' Thru the Back Door of the Medical Industry

2007-01-11T12:18:00.000-08:00

Passin’ Thru the Medical Industry’s Back Door: How I Learned to Love Big (Nice) Brother

The excitement of visiting Dr. Bigpipe for my first-ever colonoscopy had time to build: 24 hours, more or less. That’s how long I couldn’t eat any solid food. So I went on a unique "7-Up Diet." Actually it was something called "Sierra Mist" that I found in the fridge at work. I first tried some leftover apple juice but that stuff is sweeter than pop, so I rejected it for the Mist. Along with water and coffee.

By the end of the work day I lusted after every nosh, mint or crumb that caught my eye. People were munching chips within my sight, which was just plain cruelty. So I went home and drank laxatives.

Whoa, that’s some potent stuff. Don’t plan a flight to Tokyo after a hit of that joy juice. It all came out fine, though.

Then the big morning came. My sweet Maggie drove me to the burbs, the seat of the American Medical Industry. Where everyone was Nice.

I mean really nice. It turns out that all of the medical personnel went to Nice School. The nurses, assistants, the nobodies and even The Man. In Nice School they apparently learn to answer questions politely while smiling. I asked lots of questions, testing the limits of this Nicetude. It almost crossed over to Too Nice, like when the sales guy wants to sell you the Extended Warranty. You know how Nice that can be.

All that Nicety was important, especially after they told me to show up at 8:00, then ignored me till 8:45 and then acted like I was nuts when I asked what was up with that.

Another thing I learned today – this was my first visit to a hospital since I was born -- is that the nerve center of the hospital is the Legal Department. I cannot tell you how many forms I signed, waiving my rights or acknowledging my lack thereof. A clipboarder would read me something as they signed that they were reading it to me, then another Nice One would come in and read the same thing again.

After the "procedure," they claimed I was too groggy to put on my clothes and skedaddle. But though allegedly too goofy to pull my shorts up, I was given yet another form to sign. My reading glasses were in the plastic bag with my clothes. But I gladly signed. It was just like the end of 1984: I loved Big Brother.

The third thing I learned – well, I surely knew it but now it was up close -- is that despite the Nice atmosphere, the old plantation scene is not completely dead. In the pre civil rights era south, a 60 year old man was a Boy, meant to address a young buck as Sir. Here, the 60-year old is "Stosh," the yet-more-senior nurse is "Sue," and the 30-something is "Doctor Goldsmith." Quick, name one other field where this is the case. Stumped? Me too.

Dr. Goldsmith seemed Nice. He even went to personally talk to Maggie, which surprised me. Because I saw the production line of butts waiting for him. I can hardly wait to see the fee and then multiply by the that butt count. My calculator may need more battery power for that day’s income.

One last thing about Goldie: I brought up the recent study which indicated that doctors who schedule too many colonoscopies go too fast and miss things, so people get cancer and needlessly die. He said "You’d be surprised. Six minutes is a long time." That was the very moment at which the anesthetic worked its magic.

The big poke itself? I slept through it.

The Class v AOL Time Warner

2006-11-13T12:44:00.000-08:00

"Class action." I’ve liked the sound of that for 30 years.

Early on, I joked to myself it meant what it says, action by the class. In America of course it means no such thing.

I was schooled by socialists that the courts are the enemy. I was handed xeroxed essays on workers and the legal system written by an obscure attorney in New York. Later I met Burt. He went to Yale law school but wore slippers in his office, which was rather like one of those smoky, crowded junk stores on Jos. Campau Street. Those stores are inviting, yet closer to weird after you enter. This was our legal guru. And a fine one, too.

Whoa, that’s all a digression. Today’s topic is AOL. They deserve a class action lawsuit. It’s a winner waiting to happen. And fun, too.

AOL won’t let you cancel your service. Ever.

Look I know corporations are bad. Burt knew it, and so do you. But usually they don’t operate like a street-corner shakedown thug.

Me v AOL

In June, Maggie canceled our AOL service. It was hard but she did it (so we thought). It was actually made easier, because just a week before, the media had exposed their scam. A reporter called to cancel, recorded the ensuing call, and printed the transcript. He was told over and over that he could not cancel.

AOL Time Warner, one of the largest corporations in the world, then responded swiftly to this situation: they fired the minimum wager who read their script to the reporter.

Maggie reminded the CSR (that’s what they’re actually called, and will be so referenced in our class action suit) of that story, as he was telling her all the reasons she could not cancel. But, after a long time and several beers, she did it.

Our AOL service stopped working. That told us that we had successfully escaped AOL. The future looked bright.

No such luck. Unbeknownst to us, AOL reinstated it shortly after. Clever, huh? We would never know, since of course we were not using AOL anymore.

Each month they took money from our credit card, and each month we contested it to Visa. After three months I demanded Visa refuse to pay them anymore. That’s when the nice Visa CSR taught me something: "Once a merchant gets your number, they can use it anytime. Your only recourse is to cancel your credit card." Inviting, but too much like losing.

It was time to call AOL again. Of course a persistent CSR tried to lead me in circles. I reduced my end of the dialogue to one word sentences: "Cancel!" After 30 minutes on the phone, "Douglas" (all over India people are saddled with aliases like "Douglas" and "Nelson," names that sound like they've time-traveled back to the British Raj. Shouldn’t a few be Mack, Betty, or even Butch?) gave me a "confirmation number."

Meanwhile, Maggie did the impossible. Over 1000 people have summited Mt. Everest, but nobody has ever obtained an actual fax number or address for AOL. Try it sometime, if you have several hours to waste, like if you get sentenced to life-with-internet-access.

I faxed them a letter demanding a full refund. I believe, deep in my heart, that this is the first and only time anyone has ever faxed AOL such a letter.

I may not be the best plaintiff. Because, as of this moment, and trust me I don’t consider it permanent – we are ahead of AOL Time Warner. It turns out they actually did refund our credit card, in response to the fax. The guy or gal at the fax, like the Maytag Repair Man in those 1960s ads, never had anything to do, then finally got one, and snapped into action.
And, since we already contested all the payments, we have a double refund. Yeah right...AOL still has our credit card number.

I posted my tale on a site with a name like ripoffreport.com, where there are loads of identical AOL stories.

When I posted it, I checked a box that said "I authorize giving out my name to attorneys filing a class action lawsuit." Surely all the AOL posters clicked that box, with the enthusiasm that generates an audible clack coming from the mouse.

I’m ready to be contacted. It’s time for action of the class.